i'm disgusted with the adult world. all this week i've been turning over in my mind all week the fear of growing up to have nobody. the fear of being alone and never getting married. i don't care about sex, the entire idea disgusts me! even moreso now!
i don't ever want to get married now, because i don't ever want to have sex. it's disgusting and vile and everything that reminds me of it reminds me of the feeling in my stomach i get when i feel i'm about to throw up. yea, ever wonder why i act like such a prude sometimes?! well this is it! i detest when someone replies to the comment 'fuck you!' with some kind of positive and/or excited air. it's not meant to be an invitation to whatever bastard i'm talking to! it's meant to be the lowest of insults. the ultimate way to show that you're pissed at them and as of right then, you don't ever want to see them again! 
i hate sex! who gives a shit if it's supposed to be the ultimate form of pleasure?! everything that comes from it is vile, unless of course, you're married. but how many times does that happen?! not often. it's times like these that i wish i was a little kid again, back when girls and boys were undeniably equal! back when hanging out with a member of the opposite sex wasn't assumed to be a lead to any sort of relationship above friendship! back when all you had to worry about was getting cooties! where's peter pan and tinkerbell when you need them, dammit?! just because you're already physically an adult and have been for years doesn't mean that you never wanna grow up and wouldn't mind being taught to fly and run away to nver-neverland where you never-ever have to grow up.
2 comments:
I don't wanna intrude on your rant parade, but marriage doesn't always mean having sex. In today's world, sex is pretty much no longer linked to marriage. It gets abused more than ever. The person that is right for you will understand that you don't want sex or don't like it. Being optimistic of course. I know things don't always work out like we'd like them too and now that we get older we miss our childhood days when everything was amazing and fun. We each have our paths to take and some of us may end up being alone. However, I'd much rather be alone than face having a divorced relationship, and having to be responsible for a child or be in a relationship that no longer has that spark. Try not to worry so much about the future, what happens happens. Keep your mind in the present.
"You must learn to live in the present, not in the future or the past. Life must be seized at the moment. By living in the present you are in full contact with yourself and your environment, your energy is not dissipated and is always available. In the present there are no regrets as there are in the past. By thinking of the future, you dilute the present. The time to live is now."
----Ninja Vanish------
Sex is not a bad thing. When you care about someone, its really nice to be able to do things like it, and overall its a lot of fun. It can be used wrong though, and people can end up really hurt by it.
That's my opinion, but yours is probably more accurate. You seem to have a lot more backing it up.
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